Do we have to meet in a bar to have sex?

I’m not going to beat around the bush. I don't’ know what are the reasons for women but I do know the reasons for men. The male party go to bars for ONLY three reasons: 1)Sex; more than 90% of the men that go to bars hope to meet someone and get “lucky” or have a “one night stand.” 2)Alcohol; some men believe that they must have a drink to have the confidence to dance with a girl or approach her to have a conversation. These hunters also believe that alcohol will help “loosen” the girl and make her more friendly and horny. Of course a few of them are just alcoholics and can’t live without alcohol. 3)Fun; a few party goers think the bar is actually fun and exciting and a great place to make friends. They are not ONLY there to have a “one night stand” or to get drunk.

Now that the complete truth about male species in bars has been revealed, I would like to find out if there are others who would like to meet someone outside of bars. As for me, I really don’t like to drink alcohol and I don’t smoke. I hate going to clubs because there is too much cigarette smoke in the air which makes my throat hurt. The only thing that I like about the bars are that the girls look hot and very sexy. Unfortuneately, it’s difficult to tell sometimes what their real motive is for being in the bar.

I know that people use alcohol for social reasons. Not only does alcohol “loosen up” women, it also lets the woman know that the man has lots of money. Alcohol in bars are much more expensive than in a marketplace because of social status. If a host gives everyone a round of drinks, then he is letting the ladies know that he is very wealthy. It’s difficult for a woman to refuse a man who will offer to buy her a very expensive drink.

I may be different from some guys, but I don’t need a drink to help me communicate with girls or to impress her with how much money I have. I’ll admit that I’m not rich but I’m financially stable. I can think of many other ways to use the money other than to buy expensive drinks. For example, I have some friends from a country in Africa that are studying computer science in Shanghai. But the economy in their country has had an inflation rate of up to 10,000% last year! Needless to say, they are struggling to make payments for school, tuition, etc. So I help them by giving them some money for cafeteria food instead of buying some hot girl some drinks so that I can get “lucky”.

Ladies! What would you rather have? Would you rather have a charming man pay for your drinks or use the money to buy you flowers or take you to a nice dinner? Or would you rather he save the money on drinks to take you to a trip or vacation? Would you rather he spend most of his money on alcohol or for something else?

I’ll admit that I am a Christian and that it is easy for me to take care of my body by working out and refusing alcohol and smoking. But I’m not a perfect saint and I’m still human. I have my weaknesses. Even though I’m a Christian, I like sex. No…I LOVE sex! I have not had many partners in my lifetime because of my faith. Most of the time, I practise abstinence. Yet I’m still a hungry male animal and there has never been a day in my lifetime since I was 12 years old that I don’t think or dream about sex. I desire to be married so that I don’t have to face the temptation of having sex outside of marriage. However, I haven’t met the “right one” for me yet and I don’t want to be married just so that I can have sex. But at the age of 32, it is very difficult to live a “pure” life all the time.

So back to the original question. Do we have to meet in bars to have sex? Or a better question, “Do we have to meet in bars to have a meaningful relationship?” Is there any place else that we can meet? Or are there other ways to communicate besides being online? Ladies! How do you want men to approach you? What are your fantasies? Or how do you REALLY AND HONESTLY want men to treat you? Please don’t beat around the bush by answering these questions.

I’m sure that I will receive a great deal of negative criticism from men. That’s OK. But I really would like to know what ladies think. Why do they go to bars? Are there better places to be at to have fun? Etc. Look forward to both male and felmales’ feedback!

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Replies to This Discussion

Permalink Reply by Benjamin009 on April 23, 2009 at 1:55pm: GOing out, it's a style of life, i won't judge that, it's just how our world is.... You want to be recognize, accept by people, you have to go out , even more in shanghai , a foreigner between 20 and 35years old have to go out, show his self in the bar, club, restaurant, evertyghin you want to show his self, that he is alive, You want to find an other way to meet people, then just go to visit shanghai. ... But how are you going to introduce yourself with people you never talked before... Bar is the place to go, because people go there or there, depends of what they like, the decoration, musik, customers, Why do you think you can buy a glass of vodka for 20 kuai in Windows and over 200( if it's a good vodka) in Mint, people go to the club they can afford themselves... You don't want to go out anymore, because of the cigarette smoke, of the high alcohol price, then don't, don't need to say that any guy going out want sex, not only guy are sex animals, i know girls craziest than me, stay with your hand and enjoy your life... And when you will know that you need someone wake up beside you every morning, you will be agree with Shawn and meet up girls online....
Xoxo

Ben.P; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Siberia on April 23, 2009 at 1:58pm: I dont lile bar so much.
Some times we cant made a really friend there.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by sammi on April 23, 2009 at 1:59pm: I think maybe it is easy to get sex after you drink alcohol, hehe. and most of men go to bars or clubs, they just want to one night stand. so how can we do? we can't so serious, right? otherwise you will get hurt.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Hebe on April 23, 2009 at 1:59pm: well...
go to bar for dance....when you listen exceting music and dance crazy,you will forget all the sad thing,haha...
the best love as a Cinderella who put on the crystal shoes...haha.
@_@; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Siberia on April 23, 2009 at 2:03pm: And of course a lot of websites thay help you to make friend but quite a few men still just wanna find some sex or have fun.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by S. on April 23, 2009 at 2:14pm: I like the way you think. Personally, the first reason i go clubbing is just to have fun and by having fun i mean dancing.I really love dancing and of course i do it at home sometimes,but i prefer doing it in the club with my friends around. Second reason is that it gets really boring sometimes in here and the only places where u can find people like you is out...in da club. As for people trying to impress ladies by buying them "expensive drinks",and then maybe "get lucky", well that's their own choice. Maybe they don't have another way for meeting ladies or as u said they can only loosen up after a few drinks.To each their own...People are different. I don't care if a guy offers me champagne or whatever expensive drink since i know i'll go home like i came,ie alone or with my friends. I don't know about other ladies out there but i do know that some of us don't go to the bars etc to get "picked up",just to shake our booty and feel great after that coz for me, i do feel great after dancing,especially when i have not done so in a long time. Now would i prefer a man that saves his money to take me to a nice trip? Of course i would, but i would hope that there are awesome clubs where we go so we can both enjoy some fun there. Another thing is, they don't ONLY sell alcohol in the clubs and who said one can only have fun and enjoy music after they are tipsy? Sometimes it's all about the atmosphere...Finally i have been here for quite some time now, but really, i still haven't found another way to have fun or meet new people (friends or else) than in da club...If there are i would love to know them...Cheers!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by annika on April 23, 2009 at 2:16pm: I like to go to bars, because i am afraid of lonely. I like to take a cocktail sitting on the edge of the bar, and watching handsome guy or hot girl enjoy themselves. It is a beautiful scenery.
It is a favor for guys to buy a drink for you, it may means that you are attractive. I am on top of the world: ); ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by hi on April 23, 2009 at 2:32pm: DO whatever you likes in life in the nice way please ! who cares whatever other people 's talk !; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Dan on April 23, 2009 at 2:40pm: I like to dance too. Only I personally don't care for all of the smoke in the air. If only they had a smoke free club. That would be great!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Dan on April 23, 2009 at 2:42pm: Haha! I have stayed with my hand for too long!haha!; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Dan on April 23, 2009 at 2:44pm: Wow! you feel that you are on top of the world when a man offers you a drink. What if he offered you a kiss instead?;-P; ▶ Reply to This